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Balls
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I teach piano, composition/songwriting, theory, and electronic music to people of all ages and ability. I've taught online since 2015. Years ago I began somewhat specializing in teaching music to people with mental illness, physical and developmental disabilities, ADHD, autism spectrum, and basically anyone who simply struggles or feels bored with how music is generally taught. I often make music arrangements for whatever my students would like to learn: including classical pieces, pop songs, movie/TV themes, video game soundtracks, etc; always arranged to their strengths. 

I never saw the Tom Cruise movie The Last Samurai, but I wrote a song on what it's probably about

Truest Haiku

Truest Haiku - Paul Swartzel
00:00 / 01:20
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Twas a little boy in Japan
(And this is true)
It was hard times, Pre-World War 2
Pre-Kamikazes comin down from the sky
when Tom Cruise ruled as The Last Samurai
.....and he was a tyrant

Threw the boy's mama in the Slam
Cause she blew
Outlaw Tunes on the Japanese Flute
meaning Dance Hall Days, Wang Chung cover band
Boy got in his truck, went down to jail, and made demands:

"Hey Cruise, I'm here to do three things:
Get my mama
Kick some ass
and play some Japanese flute music....
Looks like I'm almost outta flute, MANE, gimme my mama."


Cruise told him to beat it and scram,
"DIsperse!
Wait, ya want ya mama, ya better gimme a verse
bout something sacred to your kin."

Boy said a curse
The F word, the worst,
and on a whim
boy said with a grin

(oh, jus look at that grin)

"You Want a Haiku?
You can't handle a Haiku

A Few Good Men 2"

The Director said "Cut!
We're gonna make a billion bucks!
Make a trailer that goes...
Weeeouuuooooewwwww"


And they did. 

Because

The Industrial Revolution
Has Been a Disaster
For The Human Race





 

Snake Bite Memorial

Snake Bite Memorial
00:00 / 01:10

Good day to you, and you, and you

and a Good Day Everybody, Hey!

That’s not how we do things in Indianapolis

 

Oh, No thanks to you and you and you

That't not how we do things!

​

That’s NOT how we do things in Indianapolis.

 

"The Snake Bite Memorial 

Takes up all the land with 

Names of those killed by snakes..

...lot bigger than our Vietnam

 

and It’s shaped like a Snake

One that swallowed an egg

well, with no more room you gotta go up

with bigger font for the wealthy dead

 

Some parts an names removed,

now some soldier's souvenir

'Oh, we’ll get them back!'

That's what they say

at least election year... 

 

But not today

 

Everybody sayin':

​​

“Get rid of the snakes

Get rid of the snakes

Get rid of the snakes!

Get rid of em , rid of em......"

​

But that's not how we things in 

IN-DI-ANA-AP-PO-LIS

​

THAT'S not how we do things

No, we don't.

That’s NOT how we do things in Indianapolis

 

We got room to build.

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